[dying]

today i was crying and shaking and sniffling and breaking down more than i have in months. for no real reason, i don't know anymore.

my mother cornered me. and my friends cornered me. and i guess it's me going back to medication and getting some "talk help" or whatever. i felt betrayed and vulnerable and i kept cursing myself that i came back to the house when i was going to just drive away and not come home at all that day.

i'm tired of this lump in my throat and these tears in my head. this anxiety is choking me with all of it's strength while this depression suffocates me with a thick downy pillow and i'm so tired of fighting for this shit life any longer...

i'm ready to let go...

July 29, 2004 - 12:47 am