[silent fall]

im going thru a fuk'd phase of life. i dont exactly know what iz goin' on inside my mind. for some special reason, im hiding away from the world, again. but the feeling is different this time. i used to abhor this world, with hatred and resentment, with sadness and depression. now, i feel a sense of tranquility, peace in the mind. i do not understand why. im thinkin' perhaps im supposed to sort things out and search for what i want. but my mind is in a void. unsure and uncertain. i am so sadly in luv. that i feel nonchalance, an unwillingness to move on, no interest in whatsoever. why is my luv unrequited? why do i end up getting such treatment when i treat the one man with sincerity and kindness, most of all, love. yet, he shows no appreciation. why did i fall in luv knowing it could never be? issit so, that no matter what i do i can never change him? i only wish to be the one for him. but my wish will never come true

April 06, 2002 - 10:37 p.m.